I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.
Taking forever to pick up a phone call because you're dancing to your ring tone.
The awkward moment when you politely decline food at a friends house and immediately regret the decision afterwards.
Immaturity keeps me young.
It's not how much you love someone that matters, it's how much you make them feel loved.
Finding the meaning to life gives life no meaning.
Love me always, love me never, but don't love me sometimes.
I don't have an attitude, I have a personality you can't handle.
Rappers always talk about robbing people in their songs, thats why I download all their songs for free. Payback!
Dear Bull, What did I do to deserve so much shit?
I swear Mario is a hobo! he wakes up wearing the same clothes, runs in sewers, and steals coins. To buy what. MUSHROOMS?
I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks.
No really officer, I'm not as think as you drunk I am.
If you got haters, you must be doing something right.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Life is so much funnier when you have a dirty mind.
"Dude, that song is old." Sorry, I didn't notice the expiry date.
Accept what you can't change and change what you can't accept.
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