Your actions are speaking so loudly, I cannot hear what you are saying.
The world is full of guys, be a man.
Admit it! At one point in your life you closed the fridge really slowly to see when the light turns off.
I don't fail, I succeed in finding what does not work.
The more pictures you post of your pet the more lonely you are. It's science.
I don't watch any reality TV because I seriously can't afford to hate society any more than I already do.
Don't fall in love, fall off a bridge, trust me, it hurts less.
Just because your smart doesn't mean your wise.
I should've known it wasn't going to work out between my ex-wife and me. After all, I'm a Libra and she's a bitch.
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
I don't have enough middle fingers to show you how I feel.
Born to be different, like everyone else.
I will stop loving you when the mute guy tells the deaf guy that the blind guy saw a legless man walk on water, yeah that means never.
The awkward moment when Edward and Santa bump into each other in your room because they're both watching you sleep.
I can only endure saying goodbye because saying hello again will be all the sweeter.
If you aren't good at lying, you better be good at keeping secrets.
The awkward moment when a guy has bigger boobs than you.
A soulmate is meeting the piece of you that is missing. It's undeniable and scary, but you feel lost without it.
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