When I watch MTV Cribs, the feeling of guilt from illegally downloading songs goes away.
A girl looks at what a man drives. A woman looks at what drives a man.
Why is a school zone 20mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...
You got enemies, good that means you stood up for something.
Science has made us gods even before we are worthy of being men.
Testing boys by not responding to their txts to see if they'll txt you again.
I'm thinking of a finger, and it's not 1, 2, 4, or 5.
Its the scars that can't be seen that take the longest to heal.
Love is just a word, until someone comes along and gives it meaning.
Cry over cuts and stitches not bastards and bitches.
I think 'First Response' and 'Plan B' should switch names.
I wish I was as much of a morning person as my penis is.
Don't fall in love, fall off a bridge, trust me, it hurts less.
You don't like my opinion, wait until you hear the ones I keep to myself.
What are the three words guaranteed to humiliate men everywhere?'Hold my purse.'
I've just moved you to the top of my 'to do' list.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
True friends stab you in the front!
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