I study for minutes and take breaks for hours.
Just like every president has a teleprompter, every idiot has a cameraman.
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
If you got haters, you must be doing something right.
Winners don't wait for chances, they grab them.
Some people should be high-fived...in the face.
Chuck Norris was bit by a poisonous snake. After 5 days of excruciating pain, the snake died.
People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.
Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
Don't fall in love, fall off a bridge, trust me, it hurts less.
Cool story bro. Needs more dragons.
I'm experiencing Deja Vu and Amnesia at the same time... I think I've forgotten this before...
Jesus can walk on water but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
A good friend buys you lunch. A true friend eats yours.
Men are like parking lots; all the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped.
Its much easier to apologize then it is to get permission.
I swear to drunk I'm not god.
Cool story bro. Wanna hear mine? It's a fairy tale; once upon a time, I don't give a shit. The end.
© 2014 EpicQuotes |