Alarm Clocks, because every morning should begin with a heart attack.
Life is so much funnier when you have a dirty mind.
Fairy tales are more than true; not because they tell us that dragons exist, but because they tell us that dragons can be beaten.
You said what you said and you said what you said, so what you said is what you said.
You know you love her when people think you're crazy.
Jingle bells, Twilight smells, Edward ran away, Bella died, Jacob cried, POTTER ALL THE WAY!!
If at first you don't succeed..... CHEAT!
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
A man can sweep any woman off her feet, he just needs the right broom.
You got enemies, good that means you stood up for something.
I study for minutes and take breaks for hours.
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
If being sexy were against the law you'd be guilty as charged.
The awkward moment when someones yelling at you and your desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.
11.24265336624% of people pay too much attention to details.
I'm not an alcoholic, I only drink two times a year. On my birthday, and when its not my birthday.
Every woman is beautiful, it just takes the right man to see it.
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
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