Mario: An Italian plumber that was created by Japanese people, who speaks English, but looks like a Mexican.
I'm not single. I'm in a long-standing relationship with fun and freedom.
Mom: What do you think I am, made of money? Daughter: Isn't that what MOM stands for?
Gravity is not the reason why people fall in love.
The word 'studying' was made up of two words originally - 'students dying'.
Ladies, the only time it is okay to be skeleton skinny is when you are dead. So eat the frigging cookie and enjoy it.
May the bridges I burn today, light the path tomorrow.
I eat problems, then shit out success.
People are stupid, with random moments of brilliance.
Don't erase your haters, embrace your haters.
The awkward moment when someones yelling at you and your desperately trying not to laugh at their angry face.
Cool story bro. In what chapter do you shut the fuck up in?
My grandma is 80 and she still doesn't need glasses... she drinks straight out of the bottle.
Women may not hit harder, but they hit lower.
Accept what you can't change and change what you can't accept.
It is true that there is no "I" in team. But there is an "I" in win.
If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.
When I'm bored, I eat. When I'm happy, I eat. When I'm sad, I eat.
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