Playing comes first, you can work later.
He who laughs last didn't get it.
An apple a day may keep the doctor away - but all these Macbooks are getting expensive.
Me: *sneeze* Class: *silence*. Popular girl: *sneeze* Class: God bless you amazing and lovely sweetheart.
A good friend buys you lunch. A true friend eats yours.
Cool story bro. Needs more dragons.
I need a six month holiday, twice a year.
I tried to send you the most sexy thing on the planet, but the mail man told me to get out of the mailbox.
It's not the goodbye that hurts, but the flashbacks that follow.
Regret lasts longer than fear.
I hate when you offer someone a sincere compliment on their mustache and suddenly she's not your friend anymore.
Is that a mirror in your pocket? Cause I can see myself in your pants.
Life is like a penis, when it gets hard, fuck it.
I always wanted to be someone. I see now that I should have been more specific.
The awkward moment when you realize that people are really laughing at you, not with you.
In my dreams you're mine, in my life you're a dream.
Negativity is poison for the soul.
It's better to be the owner of your silence than the slave of your words.