Coughing in front of smokers to make them feel guilty.
A good friend buys you lunch. A true friend eats yours.
The notion that you feel my pain is extremely uncertain. You have to apply the experience and pain of my life in order to come to this road.
Trust in God but lock your car.
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
Sometimes I look at people and think: That sperm actually won?
Charlie Sheen just set record for 'fastest time to reach a million Twitter followers.' Not his only speed record.
Rappers always talk about robbing people in their songs, thats why I download all their songs for free. Payback!
The toughest thing about success is that you've got to keep on being a success.
Giving up does not always mean you're weak, sometimes it just means your strong enough to let go.
People are lonely because they build walls instead of bridges.
Mephobia. The fear of becoming so awesome that everyone dies.
If they dont chase you when you walk away....keep walking.
I'm killing time, waiting for time to kill me.
Brushing your teeth before breakfast, is the same as wiping your ass before taking a shit.
I'm a bitch? You're a bitch. Your mom's a bitch for having a bitch, your dad's a bitch for fucking a bitch. Now who's the bitch, bitch?
Lifes a bitch....so when life sucks just sit back and enjoy the head.
KEEP YOUR HEAD HIGH, and you're middle finger HIGHER.
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