You know you're getting old when people start telling you how young you look.
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
You can't buy love....but you pay heavily for it.
I don't believe in miracles. I rely on them.
My brain: 5% names, 3% phone numbers, 2% stuff I should know for school, 90% song lyrics.
Today was a beautiful day. Then you showed up.
You're never too old to learn something stupid.
Never lie to someone who trusts you. Never trust someone who lies to you.
Fear not the weapon, but the hand that wields it.
I hate when I'm on the couch after a long day, I put the TV on and then my family starts having a competition of who can be the loudest.
Baby, I treat you like my homework, I'll slam you on the table and do you all night long.
Taking forever to pick up a phone call because you're dancing to your ring tone.
2011: Cool story, bro. 1836: Interesting tale, my fine companion.
Never frown, because you never know who's falling in love with your smile.
Why is a school zone 20mph? That seems like the optimal cruising speed for pedophiles...
Your actions are speaking so loudly, I cannot hear what you are saying.
You can hold on to a person but not a relationship.
If all MEN are the same, why do WOMEN take so long to choose one?