Bombing for peace is like fucking for virginity.
Make money, don't let it make you.
Stubbing your toe and telling the inanimate object to f*ck off.
The notion that you feel my pain is extremely uncertain. You have to apply the experience and pain of my life in order to come to this road.
Ran into my ex last week... backed up and ran over his ass again.
History always has a way of repeating itself, bad or good, a perfect circle.
I want a person who comes into my life by accident, but stays on purpose.
The awkward moment when you're on a bouncy castle and you fall down and the other bitches on there wont stop jumping so u can't get back up.
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of bill payments.
It sucks that you can't photoshop that personality too, bitch.
Sometimes I look at people and think: That sperm actually won?
Sleep, hugs, kisses, love, friends, family, memories, smiles, laughter, fun... the best things in life are free.
When life puts you in tough situations don't say "WHY ME?", just say "TRY ME".
Dear Bull, What did I do to deserve so much shit?
Wherever you go, there you are.
I know the beginning and end of this book but what shapes life are the chapters between.
