Teacher: "You failed the test." - Student:"You failed to educate."
Lifes a bitch....so when life sucks just sit back and enjoy the head.
It's not how much you love someone that matters, it's how much you make them feel loved.
Cool story bro, changed my life.
You can't shake hands with a clenched fist.
Make money, don't let it make you.
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
I'm your favorite hello and your hardest goodbye.
The awkward moment when you're eavesdropping on a strangers conversation and accidentally laugh out loud at a funny part.
You are the result of 4 billion years of evolutionary success. Fucking act like it.
If karma doesn't knock you out soon, I will.
From a girl's point of view, the guy always chooses the slut. From a boy's point of view, the girl always chooses the jerk.
I love that whenever we speak I have no idea what to say or how to feel.
Rappers always talk about robbing people in their songs, thats why I download all their songs for free. Payback!
I will still love you when you're no longer young and beautiful.
If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of bill payments.
We're all born screaming, naked, and starving...then it's pretty much downhill from there.
I'm not insulting you, I'm describing you.
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