Real eyes realize real lies.
Got an issue? Get a tissue.
Act like a gentleman, think like a boss.
Life is so much funnier when you have a dirty mind.
Everyone has photographic memory; some just don't have the film.
If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down.
Cool story bro, tell it again and I'll punch you.
Boys will break your heart, Real men will pick up the pieces.
Winners don't wait for chances, they grab them.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
I tried to send you the most sexy thing on the planet, but the mail man told me to get out of the mailbox.
That awkward moment when your pet is staring at you naked...
I'm invisible, can you see me? Yeah? How about tomorrow night?
So you're the bitch that told the bitch that I'm a bitch well listen bitch it takes a bitch to know a bitch, bitch.
Know one cares how much you know, unless they know how much you care.
Truth can stand on its own, only lies require faith.
Talk is cheap because supply exceeds demand.
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
