The world is a fucked up place. You fit right in.
I wish I was as much of a morning person as my penis is.
There are needs and there are wants. I need what I want.
This duct tape makes everything you say sound like "yes".
History always has a way of repeating itself, bad or good, a perfect circle.
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Except marriage, marriage will kill you.
Whatever doesn't kill you, makes you weaker and weaker until it eventually kills you.
I don't watch any reality TV because I seriously can't afford to hate society any more than I already do.
Relationship status: Thank god there are 2 TVs in this house.
Nice shoes! Wanna screw?
I went up to my moms face and screamed " I WANT FOOD !!! " Until I got slapped in the face
When your best friend comes to you with a bitch problem and you're like"I don't give a fuck."
Man: created by God, destroyed by a women.
I want to go to Heaven for the climate, and Hell for the company.
Chuck Norris puts the "fun" in "Funeral".
Immaturity keeps me young.
Don't fall in love, fall off a bridge, trust me, it hurts less.
You're only as good as your last game.
