When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Kim Jong Il's last words. "Hey, you're Chuck Nor....."
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
Chuck Norris was bit by a poisonous snake. After 5 days of excruciating pain, the snake died.
Chuck Norris puts the "fun" in "Funeral".
Chuck Norris made orange juice concentrate.
Ironically, Chuck Norris' hidden talent is invisibility.
Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.
If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the fuck down.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
Chuck Norris has three types of laundry...whites, darks and blood stained.
F that B.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 52 people. Then the grenade exploded.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
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