Chuck Norris was bit by a poisonous snake. After 5 days of excruciating pain, the snake died.
Chuck Norris has three types of laundry...whites, darks and blood stained.
If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
Chuck Norris will never die of a heart attack because his heart isn't that foolish to attack him.
F that B.
Chuck Norris puts the "fun" in "Funeral".
They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Jesus can walk on water but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
Ironically, Chuck Norris' hidden talent is invisibility.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.
Chuck Norris made orange juice concentrate.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Chuck Norris threw a grenade and killed 52 people. Then the grenade exploded.
If you lost your virginity, Chuck Norris probably has it.
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