We are bestfriends. Always remember that when you fall, I'll pick you up. After I finish laughing.
Boobs. That's all, just like this if you like boobs.
When life throws a rock at you, throw back a brick.
Teacher: "DO YOU WANT TO SPEND LUNCH IN MY CLASS?!" Me: Are you asking me out? O_O
I know I have friends and I know I have enemies. I just can't tell who is who.
I am not afraid of death, it's just that I prefer not to be there when it happens.
Dreams lift when reality falls.
Giving up does not always mean you're weak, sometimes it just means your strong enough to let go.
If God is watching us, the least we can do is be entertaining.
Patience gets you everywhere on time.
Life is like a penis. It's short, but seems so long when it gets hard
The minute you settle for less than what you deserve you get less than what you settled for.
I don't believe in miracles. I rely on them.
The awkward moment when you're on a bouncy castle and you fall down and the other bitches on there wont stop jumping so u can't get back up.
How much coke did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.
If I'm weird with you, I'm comfortable with you.
Whatever doesn't kill you, makes you weaker and weaker until it eventually kills you.
It's weird not to be weird.
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