Real eyes realize real lies.
Born to be different, like everyone else.
Who you are, who you want to be, and who you once were can be three different people.
Don't break anybody's heart, they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206.
If someone tries to bring you down it means that you are higher than them.
My psychiatrist told me I was crazy and I said I wanted a second opinion. He said okay, you're ugly too.
You should never ruin an apology with an excuse.
I will love you until the end. If you feel that I don't love you, this is just the beginning.
I've just moved you to the top of my 'to do' list.
Eventually people will realize that mistakes are meant for learning not repeating.
Life is like a penis. It's short, but seems so long when it gets hard
You never know how precious it is until you lose it. And you never know how annoying it is until you have it.
Research shows that 90% of men don't know how to use condom, these people are called DADS.
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery but today is a gift. That is why they call it the present.
Men are like parking lots; all the good ones are taken and the rest are handicapped.
I say excuse me when I burp even when nobody is around....true gentleman.
The awkward moment when people are complaining about the sizes of their nose when Voldemort's in the room.
A girl just told me she wants something with a lot of diamonds for her birthday, I'm gettin her a deck of cards!
