Accept what you can't change and change what you can't accept.
Life is a case of spoon or be spooned.
This duct tape makes everything you say sound like "yes".
If you watch Jaws backwards, its about a shark who throws up so many people, they have to open a beach.
Giving up does not always mean you're weak, sometimes it just means your strong enough to let go.
I'm not addicted to Twitter. I only tweet when I have time: lunch time, break time, off time, this time, that time, any time, all the time.
I think therefore I am, we think therefore it is.
Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt.
Some cause happiness wherever they go. Others whenever they go.
The last thing I want to do is die.
Boys will break your heart, Real men will pick up the pieces.
When life puts you in tough situations don't say "WHY ME?", just say "TRY ME".
The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
When someone says they have to ask you a question, you think of all the bad things you've done recently.
Cool story bro. Yeah your mums in the next chapter.
Off; the general direction in which I wish you would fuck.
The awkward moment when you realize that people are really laughing at you, not with you.
Always borrow money from a pessimist. He won't expect it back.
© 2014 EpicQuotes |