That awkward moment when your in class then your stomach decides to make this dying whale's voice.
I will love you until the end. If you feel that I don't love you, this is just the beginning.
Real eyes realize real lies.
Life isn't about staying dry, it's about learning how to play in the rain.
2011: Cool story, bro. 1836: Interesting tale, my fine companion.
Jesus can walk on water. Ice is 100% water, I can walk on ice. Therefore, I'M 100% JESUS BITCHES.
Jesus can walk on water but Chuck Norris can walk on Jesus.
If you got haters, you must be doing something right.
I went up to my moms face and screamed " I WANT FOOD !!! " Until I got slapped in the face
Admit it! At one point in your life you closed the fridge really slowly to see when the light turns off.
Don't punish the man in front of you for the mistakes made by the man behind you.
Homework: Do me do me. Internet: Don't listen to that slut.
That awkward moment when your pet is staring at you naked...
I have no time for stupid people. But they sure do have time for me.
If you were a transformer you would be a hot-obot called Optimus Fine.
Letting go doesn't mean giving up, but rather accepting that there are things that cannot be.
Boobs. That's all, just like this if you like boobs.
Mario: An Italian plumber that was created by Japanese people, who speaks English, but looks like a Mexican.